(Spoilers, when it comes to pizza, Italy always wins. ALWAYS.)
This is a very special Weekly Crust because this week we are reviewing the worst pizza we’ve had on our trip vs. the best we’ve had EVER. Game over, all other pizzas of the world.
For our first review, we go to the the South of France. With it’s proximity to Italy and affinity for bread and cheese, one would think the pizza of France would rival, or at least come close to the deliciousness of the pizza in Italy, and one would be … terribly, terribly wrong.
The Weekly Crust review of: Pizzaiola Chez Xavier
- Restaurant Type: Sit-down casual restaurant
- Cost: 10-14 € for a 12 inch 🍕
- Pizza Toppings: I, unsurprisingly, ordered Margherita, and Stove ordered the Prosciutto and “Goat Cheese“
- Crust-Crunchiness: Eh, I guess the crust was crunchy by the time you made your way through the gobs of cheese, but it was bland and wet in the center … so no crust-points given
- Sauce-to-Cheese Ratio: The cheese. I will have pizza-nightmares about the cheese on this pizza for the rest of my life. First off, if you examine the picture (which by the way doesn’t do the awfulness of this pizza justice), please look at the cheese chunks on Stove’s pizza – basically big hunks of brie maybe? Definitely not goat. And my cheese was a greasy, heavy mess – similar to what you’d find in a mozzarella stick at a bar.
- Quality of Ingredients: I can’t even talk about it.
- Overall Rating: 0/5 pizzas
- Synopsis: I don’t know. Maybe they were having an off night? The pictures on their site, with the wood-fired oven and the correct saucing-to-cheese ratio looked promising, but I think maybe they are catfishing us. You may be asking yourself if we’re judging this pizza too harshly … but we were in FRANCE. The birthplace of modern cooking, and cheese, probably. And so we went in with our expectations high and came out feeling violated.
After the France debacle, our pizza spirits were broken. So broken that on the first night in Italy, my favorite country in the world because pizza rains from the skies, we didn’t even eat Italian food – we had tacos. It was almost like I couldn’t face any combination of bread, sauce and cheese without remembering the trauma of France.
But I think the pizza-gods knew what they were doing. They had to show us what terrible pizza was like so we could fully appreciate what came next…
Next The Weekly Crust heads to Pizzeria La Cisterna in Capri, Italy.
- Restaurant Type: An adorable sit-down restaurant tucked down a little side street in Capri
- Cost: 10-14 € / 🍕
- Pizza Toppings: We ate here twice – first night we each had classic Margherita and the second night we also had Margherita but with sauce and Pepperoni
- Crust-Crunchiness: Crunchy and hot and crackling all the way through – I’m in love.
- Sauce-to-Cheese Ratio: Perfect, perfect, p e r f e c t!
- Quality of Ingredients: In general, I find all food in Italy tastes better than the rest of the world’s food, but now that I’ve been to Capri and had Capri-zza, I can confidently say they have the best cheese / tomatoes / sauce on the planet. Also, there is a spicy red-pepper infused olive-oil that we splashed on our ‘zzas and it took my pizza-game to a whole new level.
- Overall Rating:🍕🍕🍕🍕🍕
- Synopsis: Real talk – this pizza changed my life. It is the gold standard for which I will hold all other pizzas going forward. Not only is this pizza epiphany-inducing, the restaurant itself may be one of the most charming Italian pizzerias out there. It is so inconspicuous that you’d walk right by it if you didn’t know what you were looking for (which only adds to the charm) and the owner, Salvatore, sits in the dining area with the patrons and monitors your pizza-eating experience. In short, if you’re in Capri and you don’t visit Pizzeria La Cisterna you’re missing out on life.
P.S. – Special thanks to Anne and Johnny for bringing us here!